Kotas Reviews a One Pound Gummy Rabbit

Yeah, yeah, I know Easter is well and truly over, but damn it, this is my space and I'll review what I want to review! I am a huge fan of Easter Themed Candy, starting with my unabashed love of Cadbury Creme Eggs and Peeps of all shapes and colors (There are Lemonade Peeps! And they are amazing! GO EAT THEM!). One of the most quintessential pieces of Easter candy is the chocolate rabbit, always doomed to have the ears consumed first. While my spouse and child received the appropriate chocolate offerings, this year I decided to switch it up a bit. No chocolate for me this year. No, I was headed into the danger zone of artificial fruit flavoring and oddly synthetic textures. Ladies and Gentlemen, today we review the One Pound Gummy Bunny.

MAGNIFICENT!

I'm not a huge fan of gummy candy, but I do enjoy it on occasion, and of all gummy flavorings, I love cherry flavor the most. It reminds me of my childhood, and seeing this darling brought back some of the magic of receiving a ridiculously oversized piece of candy as a gift. Let's crack this sucker open!

Paper Towel for extra classiness.

This thing is pretty substantial to hold, and incredibly sticky. It took a bit of effort to peel it off the paper towel without bits of the towel sticking fast to the underside. The smell is almost exactly like that of raw ICEE cherry flavored syrup, or maybe that of a cherry Slush Puppie. This is a dense candy that knows how to party.

No hollow rabbit here! Solid all the way through.

The taste of this thing is the same super sweet, super fake cherry-esque flavor that an ICEE or Slushie would have once all the ice melted and you had just the syrup. This is pure solidified fake cherry syrup goodness, and every bite reminds your pancreas that you hate it. It is surprisingly tough to tear, and I had to resort to a knife to slice off acceptably sized pieces to consume and share. Even then, it was really tough to eat. It was most efficient to just take bites straight from the carcass candy mass, but just biting through it could be a chore, as it was also very chewy.

On the FACE Rating System, this glorious rabbit gets a solid two smiley faces. I would not recommend it to anyone with easily lost fillings or those who hate artificial cherry flavoring, but for gummy lovers and fake cherry lovers, I have but one suggestion:

LIVE THE DREAM!