Kotas Reviews Lava Cake Hershey's Kisses

Yeah, yeah I know it's MARCH. Lots of rain in March this year. I dread April Showers honestly, because they will bring, not May Flowers, but May Roof Repairs. Or not, I sure hope not. Anyway, I'm a bit behind in my Valentine's themed candy reviews, but does anyone care? Boy I sure hope not. Let's eat some candy! Today we review Lava Cake Hershey's Kisses.

So, yeah. That's a package.

I don't really get the fuss over lava cake in general. Sure, it's gooey and all, but the presentation always just leads me to think that the cake is underdone. All I know is that it was super trendy for a while for restaurants to have some sort of molten cake product on their menu and I wasn't having any of it. I REGRET NOTHING. Moving on, the package on these conveys the theme without overly stating it is a Valentine's Day edition of the candy. I'm not sure WHY you'd want to do that, given that it will be lumped in with the Valentine's stuff anyway, but I suppose you could argue that it doesn't deserve to be marked down 50% on February 15th if it doesn't explicitly say Valentine's Day on it. Let's tear it open!

Take it off! 

Yeah, it's a Hershey's Kiss alright. Unlike the usual ones, these have the glossier chocolate shell that is also the Hershey's version of Dark Chocolate. However, inside is a softer chocolate I think that is going for "ganache", but the Hershey version. Guess what? It's pretty darn good! While the outer shell has the standard Hershey's "plastic-y" overtone common in their dark chocolate, it is nicely mitigated by the soft center, which has a good rich Hershey's dark chocolate flavor. Yes, I'm being specific because Hershey's chocolate tends to taste unlike most other chocolate. 

On the FACE Rating System, I'd give these 1 Smiley Face. They taste pretty good, but they aren't too different from a regular Dark Chocolate Hershey's Kiss beyond texture. Still, the texture change is interesting, so give these a whirl unless you already don't like Hershey's Chocolate or Dark Chocolate. There is nothing to change your mind here.

Kotas Reviews Hershey's Gold Peanuts and Pretzels

What is it about gas stations that make them the perfect place to find new or weird snacks? Does anyone (besides me) go into a gas station with the intention of finding new or interesting things to try? Is this some sort of compulsion that only I have, yet somehow is catered to by most major convenience store chains? Did I take too many drugs? The answer to all of this and more is "I dunno, probably". With that in mind, let's take a look at Hershey's Gold Peanuts and Pretzels.

Go for the gold...colored wrapper!

If you've been reading this blog for a while, it is absolutely no secret that white chocolate and I generally don't get along. It's fine, but I will pass it up for most other confections if available. Still, some of the flavored white chocolates are decent, mostly because they no longer taste like white chocolate. Which brings us to today's treat, the Hershey's Gold Peanuts and Pretzels. I saw this in the gas station while loading up on lotto ticket (yes, ticket. Not a typo) and thought "oh hey, something new from Hershey's! Sort of, I guess." and picked one up to try.

Turns out, this is Hershey's first new candy bar since 1993, when they debuted the Cookies & Creme bar. Whodathunk it, eh? I thought maybe it had been put out as a Winter Olympics promotion, and well, I might be right, given it came out December 1st of last year. Still, I do love caramel, pretzels, and occasionally peanuts mixed in with those two things. How could I refuse? Let's eat!

Well, at least it's not grey.

I gotta be honest. This doesn't look all that appetizing. Tan isn't a great color in a candy, and while I appreciate the attempt to differentiate it from their other candy bars, the weird offset "break" pattern for the subsections of the bar makes me thing you are just trying to put one over on me and sell me less candy per bar. I don't actually think that is the case here, but it sure does look like you are tryin' to downsize me candy! Smells pretty good though, peanutty and caramelly certainly. Obviously not much pretzel, but hey, whatchagonnado? OM NOM NOM, that's what!

Well, this is decently tasty! The caramel flavor is there, but not overwhelming, and the peanut/pretzel combo works surprisingly well with no flavor really masking any other. There isn't much pretzel flavor here beyond "salt" and a bit of extra crunch here and there, but it's still a decent candy. Color me surprised, really. My kid also enjoyed it, so that's a point in its favor. Best of all, it really doesn't taste a ton like white chocolate, even though that is clearly the base.

On the FACE Rating System, this gets 1 Smiley. It's not amazing, but for something new from Hershey's, they did a good job of making an interesting candy. Good enough for the occasional indulgence, but probably not good enough for me to buy a ton of. Granted, I try not to eat much Hershey's to start with, but long trips in the car just got a bit more caramelly. Give this one a try!

Kotas Reviews Hershey's Pumpkin Spice Kisses and the Russell Stover Dark Chocolate Red Velvet Pumpkin

Hello everyone! I've been taking a bit of a break recently due to a variety of reasons, but now we're back with...more Halloween stuff. Yeah, I know, Halloween was weeks ago, but the plethora of leftover candy has kept me in a bit of a candy coma for a while. Still, I'm back now, and boy do we have some treats for you. First up, Hershey's Pumpkin Spice Kisses.

Ain't she a beaut?

Hershey's Kisses are one of the best ways to enjoy their rather uniquely American take on chocolate, being big enough to be satisfying, yet small enough not to feel like you are gorging yourself. This combines to let you look wistfully into the empty bag and wonder what exactly just happened. Still, I am generally dubious of anything that goes outside the usual parameter of "chocolate, and nothing else". Let's have a look see!

Very underwhelming, really.

These look less like a traditional Hershey Kiss, and more like the inferior white chocolate cousin, the Hershey Hug. Hugs are, at best, something to eat when you want some candy, but have nothing better. I do not particularly care for white chocolate, and Hugs get no love from me. Then again, maybe this one will be the flavored candy that alters my opinion.

A box without hinges, key or lid, yet inside whitish goo is hid!

Well, they certainly smell pumpkin spicey. Much more spice than pumpkin, yet there is a hint of it. Instead of being a solid candy all the way through, this one is a very soft center coated in a durable waxy shell. The Kiss doesn't lend itself well to this sort of thing usually but in this case, it seems to be fairly well done. The flavor is like eating a bit of heavily spiced gingerbread wax filled with some sort of creamy...something. It is incredibly artificial tasting, but it's not bad if you like nutmeg and gingerbread. There might be the barest hint of pumpkin flavor, but I couldn't find it.

On the FACE Rating System, these get 1 frowny face. They really aren't terrible or anything, but I would describe them as a good presentation of a terrible recipe. The flavor is not pumpkin, but it is spice...gingerbread spice. The mouth feel is waxy and unappealing. I did enjoy the foil though, and the little paper flag is of the highest quality. Not really recommended except for that rare breed of Hershey Kiss Completionist.

Next up from the bargain bin we have the Russell Stover Red Velvet Dark Chocolate Pumpkin. Just rolls off the tongue, doesn't it? There are a large, LARGE number of different flavored candy pumpkins that Russell Stover produces each year, and this one comes from the veritable wall that my local drug store had for sale.

Look at that face! It just screams "legitimate pumpkin candy".

Russell Stover is what I call a "low tier" chocolate maker. They put out a huge variety of average quality chocolates, along with a cornucopia of themed sweets. They are at their best when you want a lot of different kinds of chocolate confections in one box, for cheap, but their theme items are only fair to middlin' in flavor. Great on price though! Let's see what mysteries await us!

That's not very pumpkin-y. It could just as easily be an ornament shape.

Now it is even less pumpkin than before!

Well, I can't say I'm excited to see this. I am not sure what I was expecting, but this is really just a candy disk with a nub at one end. It could be almost anything, so I suppose pumpkin is as likely as any other vaguely round object with a distinctive appendage. It smells of dark chocolate and...maybe devil's food cake. This is actually an encouragement, since Red Velvet cake is just Devil's Food cake with some food coloring and a good marketing department.

The flavor is, in a phrase "fucking terrible". The chocolate makes a bold attempt at being something worth eating, but it has too much of that cheap, artificial flavor to pull it off. The filling tastes like sand mixed with sugar, paste and suffering. The thing actually crunches as I chew it, as if I were consuming aquarium gravel or possibly ground glass. I managed to choke down half of the thing, and gave the other half to my long suffering wife. She boldly consumed as much as I did, and for that, I owe her. I did not gag though, so I suppose that's a plus.

On the FACE Rating System, this travesty gets 3 frowny faces. Stay the hell away from it, unless you hate yourself. Wash it down with  Bud Light Chelada for that authentic taste of misery and despair. Leftover candy is not all it is cracked up to be, that is for sure!