Kotas Reviews Filled Cupcake Oreos

You know Nabisco, I actually appreciate your current willingness to experiment. It led to a marvelous conversion of a beloved bakery treat into a delicious cookie that stands on its own, while still recognizing the flavor from whence it came. So it is understandable that you might try to catch lightning in a bottle a second time. I would have even settled for lightning bugs in a bottle. Instead, we have...well, we'll get it to it. Ladies, Gentleman, let's get a good long look at Filled Cupcake Oreos.

This was the best idea they had.

It's probably just my inner Wade Wilson talking, but the first time I saw this package I laughed out loud and started making terrible jokes. Get ready to twist and lick the white creme filling, right out of that circle of chocolate! I mean, COME ON. FILLED CUPCAKE IS NOT A FLAVOR ANYWAY! For fuck's sake, Nabisco, I get that you are going for an iconic sweet here, but let me break it down: Cupcake is an iconic sweet. Filled Cupcake is a description of an iconic Brand of Cupcakes, not a flavor in and of itself. I swear it looks like someone broke into the Chocolate Oreo facility and got waaaaaay to friendly with the production line. At least it is also in the easy access (HUR HUR HUR) package. Let's gently, delicately lay it bare.

Avert your eyes, children!

God the smell. It hits you in the face with a heavy burden of a scent I can only describe as "chemical" and it immediately put me on my back foot. Still, I must soldier on. FOR SCIENCE! These cookies passed the twist off test with flying colors and lo and behold, it is exactly as it was depicted on the package. A splortch of white gooeiness right smack dab in the middle of a chocolate filling. I just...I mean, what other comparison can I make that you, my loyal audience, have not already made? LOOK AT IT! Gaze upon it's sinful excess and be mystified at its very being. 

The licking of inner creme held no delights, only horror. It is the prime source of the chemical scent and it tastes like it. Imagine spraying your tongue with Scrubbing Bubbles mixed with sugar and that is the flavor you get. It is awful. The rest of the cookie is, well, standard chocolate Oreo, and eaten as a whole it does a good job of mitigating the terror of the inner creme, which surprised me. It's still very chemical in taste, but the two cremes manage to wrangle a chocolate and filling flavor that is almost but not quite unlike a Hostess Cupcake, which I imagine was the inspiration for this...thing.

Hostess Cupcakes are, in fact, sort of fake tasting. One can easily imagine them being prepared not by baking, but by mixing several chemicals into a bowl and having the cupcake spring forth wholly formed. However, the chemical hints are just that...hints, and they certainly aren't the focus of the snack. This takes all the wrong aspects and translates them into cookie format, and it forgets the most important one: Cupcake flavoring. This is just...not very good at all.

On the FACE Rating System, this gets 1 frowny face. The inner creme is vile, and would get 3 frowny faces on its own, but with the rest of the cookie, it is not nearly as bad. It's still bad though, and only the truly dedicated Oreo fan should even consider trying these, if only for the experience. Everyone else? Stay the hell away. Get your jollies elsewhere, cookie lovers! Though, upon reflection, I suppose you already have.