Friday, July 28, 2017

Kotas Reviews Zima

Sweet lord the Nostalgia train is a rolling hard lately in Soda Country. Coca-Cola brought back my beloved Surge (albeit only in gas stations), while Pepsi, wanting to outdo even that effort brings us Crystal Pepsi (also in gas stations...and on my list as soon as I can find it). So I guess MillerCoors wanted to get in on that sweet, sweet action and that brings us to our subject today. Ladies, Gentlemen, Kids get the fuck out of here, let's take a peak at Zima!

You magnificent BASTARD!
Yes, before that delicious plague of the beer aisle at grocery stores known as the "clear malternative beverage" assailed us in the early 2000s, with such "masterpieces" as Bacardi Silver and Smirnoff Ice, there was the granddaddy of them all, Zima. Marketed with the slogan "Zomething different" this clear boozy soda-ish "not-beer" was marketed as hip, cool, suave, and interesting. You know, like a hipster before that was a thing. You probably wouldn't know about it. Anyway, it quickly got a reputation as a "girl booze", mostly because it tasted pretty sweet and lo and behold, women drank more of it than other beers of the day. Still, for such a maligned product, it persisted until 2008, when MillerCoors discontinued it. So, why is it back, in the original bottle styling no less? I'm gonna go with "nostalgia is a powerful drug son" and move on to the resurrected product itself.

I was too young to partake of Zima when it was first released waaaaaay back in 1993, but I remember the commercials featured a guy in a white suit talking with another dude and...honestly it just being kind of strange. Definitely different, and the guy kept replacing his "s" characters with "z" ones. By the time I was old enough to consume them (and yes, they were still around at that point) I didn't bother since it had was already as uncool as bell bottoms and brightly colored leggings. Since I'm older and yes, touched by the nostalgia bug, I saw this in the store and thought "Yes, I simply MUST have this". So here we are. Let's crack it open!

Well, it's definitely clear. It looks, and smells, like boozed up Sprite. It tastes a lot like it too, with a nice citrus-y sour note so it's not super sweet, but interesting. I will say this, it certainly tasted better than I expected it to, and I happily drank a six pack's worth (with a bit of help). To be fair, I loved Bacardi Silver back in the day and this reminds me of a tangier version of that (original flavor, not the weird faux fruit versions that exist today). Who knew, right?

On the FACE Rating System, this gets TWO nostalgic Smiley Faces. While it definitely doesn't rank up there as a go to malt beverage, it's a nice change of pace when I'm feeling more in the mood for a soda, but don't want to have liquor with a mixer. Go out and get hammered 90s style, you probably won't regret it! Probably.

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